It’s funny as someone who tries so hard to instil confidence and self belief in my daughters daily, that I find myself having to write this. As much as I’m telling you to be your own cheerleader, I’m also reaffirming this to myself. You see, I spend so much time teaching my daughters important life lessons that I forget to listen to my own advice from time to time. So mums, dads, people out there reading this, here’s a reminder to stop putting yourself down and start building yourself right up into the stratosphere, or at the very least, out of your comfort zone!
I’ve been blogging for years. So many that saying just how many out loud makes me feel old. (it’s been SEVEN years, since you’re asking) So much has changed and the scene has ballooned in this time, becoming a completely different (but tame-ish) beast. I’ve been lucky enough to see my passion for writing, blogging and photography grow over this time. Over the past few years, I’ve had the great pleasure of helping friends get their own blogs off of the ground, with my advice and tutelage. Yet if someone was to recommend me to do this for a friend or pay my blog a compliment, I’d most probably shy away and do that overly modest shrug thing. But why when I have the experience and can share it? Why not be my own biggest cheerleader and put myself and my blog out there more?
I remember on the way to my first ever blogging conference, sat on a train and someone had left their business card with their blog handle on every single seat of the carriage. I remember thinking how awesome and brave she was to have done that. Obviously, I started following her immediately online and her writing, wit and personality kept me coming back for many years to come. There’s nothing wrong with a bit of self promotion.
Weight has been something I’ve had a love – hate relationship with since my late teens. I went from a very athletic physique and a washboard stomach to very overweight and self-conscious of all of my jelly in the space of a year. It was my first year of university and I’d later be diagnosed with PCOS and insulin resistance. Having the diagnosis did nothing to aid me in my weight loss, if anything it added a level of frustration to the situation. To some extent I gave up and capitulated to the idea that I’d always be overweight and would probably never have children.
Obviously, I went on to have my two amazing daughters, but for many years I was my own worse enemy. If I’d been kinder to myself, if I’d said a few positive affirmations and showed some self-care, been my own cheerleader when I really needed it, I could have probably broken the downward spiral of self-loathing and negative body image years and years ago. I’m still overweight now, but the way I deal with that mentally has changed. I don’t hate myself or see myself as ‘less than’ as I used to. I’m worthy. We all are. We don’t have to prescribe to or fit within a Western ideal of body shape to find our worth, do we?
Recently I started throwing out any item of clothing that didn’t make me feel good. If it made me look frumpy or feel uncomfortable, it went in a black bag labelled ‘Bye Felicia’ and later was donated to my daughter’s school clothing drive. Simply having clothes I felt comfortable in made such a difference to my self-esteem. I feel presentable and once in a while, actually sexy would you believe it. If you find yourself trying on outfit after outfit in the morning, maybe try this yourself. It really made my mornings so much easier!
So, being your own cheerleader. If you do something well, then don’t be afraid to share it. If you have an idea for a new business or product, don’t wait on someone else to tell you it’s ok to go for it, just do it. Cheer your own butt forward. I enjoy photography and have some great ideas for projects in my mind. So guess what? Tin’s inner cheerleader just shook her pom poms and now I’ve got a document in my Google Drive lined up with practical steps to help me see my projects reach fruition.
I’ve spoken about kicking self-doubt in the arse before and I guess this is a continuation on that theme. It’s awesome to have a tribe around you. Having the support of friends and family makes a hell of a difference but don’t be afraid to cheer yourself on too. In fact, why not make that a priority?
